Why did they block me out? After all I’ve done for them. They used me. Made me feel
important, indispensable even. Just to move on to the next big thing. You would think that the
light I brought into their lives would be something they can’t ignore. That the warmth I filled
them with was irreplicable, that it was something they couldn’t live without. Yet they still put
their walls up. Used me and once I didn’t fit the idea of ‘balance’ within their life they went and
cast me aside. Typical.
Maybe they already had time to move on. They were probably planning on this for a
while and just didn’t know how to break the news to me. This is such a huge change for us both.
We’ve known each other for lifetimes, but now that has no importance to them it seems. I’ve
seen them grow, adapt, evolve, and overcome. Even on their darkest days, although I rarely got
any recognition for it, I still managed to brighten up their lives.
Occasionally I still see them letting off steam, almost as if it’s cyclic. I prefer to keep my
distance though; I don’t need them polluting my life as they do with theirs. Sometimes I do let
them open up to me, I know I’m being used, but I guess it’s not so bad.
I miss them, I really do. So, sue me if I just want a small taste of how things used to be.
From an outside point of view, they just seem a shell of themselves. A plastic casing sealing
them off from the rest of the universe, fighting some sort of internal war. On the few occasions
they have opened up to me, they seem warmed by my presence alone. Deep down I can tell
they regret what they’ve done, but it’s far too late to turn back, to reverse the damage they’ve
done. Now our relationship will never be the same. It’s in their nature. They burn through
everything that’s good for them until there’s nothing left. And then what? Onto the next. And
onto the next. And onto the next. Nothing is ever enough for them. But now they’ve gone too
far.
A feeling of implosion washes over me when the light glistens in their eyes upon seeing
me. It’s as if I’m collapsing in on myself, a silent pressure building up around me, like a star
consumed by its own gravity. But during that moment, it seems the toxicity in their life is
forgotten.
I’ve been at the centre of their universe for countless years, yet only when I’m gone does
their world darken.
I want to resent them, I want to forget them, I want them to feel the pain I feel. They
called me the fire that warmed them, but how is it that they made me feel so cold, so lonely, so
isolated from it all, in a vacuum of my own.
Yet, when I look back at all we’ve been through, I only want to burn brighter for them.
All the turmoil they’ve caused me is forgotten. Just like it’s my first time living, it’s also theirs.
I’ve seen them start with nothing but two stones and create what looked like a smaller version
of myself. I’ve seen them mount beasts and build civilizations. I’ve seen them suffer tragedies
like plagues and natural disasters and somehow, they came back stronger from each one. I’ve
seen them travel across land, water, and the sky. I’ve seen them fight great wars. I’ve seen them
create wonders that I didn’t think possible at the start of their time. I’ve seen them make
mistakes and I’ve seen them recover from those mistakes. I’ve seen humanity face millions of
challenges, but I’ve never seen them back down. Most importantly, I’ve seen them love. And
how could you not love them.
I think I get it now. With greenhouse gases occupying most of the atmosphere and
surface temperatures continually rising, humans are facing their biggest test yet. Huge glass-like
panels framed in hexagonal paterns, resembling that of a turtle’s shell are now encasing the
planet. My view of Earth is now dimmed, as it seems they have given a significant tint to these
panels. The edge of the frame is lined with millions of small openings, sometimes smog escapes
through them. But what I love the most, what replays in my head over and over, what really
makes me believe that our story is still not over, is when the panels retract. It’s only happened
very few times. But it’s so special when it does. Everyone crowds around the openings of the
shell, beaming right back at me. It only lasts a few minutes, but I cherish every second.
What type of partner would I be to give up on them now? They never have. For now, this
means a pause in our eternal relationship, but that doesn’t mean I’ll stop lighting the way for
them. When Earth returns to its best, its beloved star, the Sun, will be waiting. I’ll be ready to
burn my brightest, in hopes that a new generation will be able to fully experience a sunny day.
